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Did I miss something? What’s going on with me? It looks as almost everyone I know over 40 is either separated, divorced, in the process of divorcing or just wants to get a divorce. Why over 40? Is it a hormonal issue? Is it the promise of a “cool” lifestyle? Or is it another one of the symptoms of “mid-age syndrome”? I’m not a relationship expert. I’m even divorced. And guess what? I got a divorce when I was 43 years young. And frankly speaking, when I was 42 years old I thought I had a good marriage. But I hear the same surprising stories almost every day. I have few insights about this phenomenon. I would like to share with you a few small changes in your lifestyles that can spice your love life as well…with your spouse. Get Out of the Comfort Zone Your comfort zone is the habits, routines and lifestyles you haven’t changed for the last 5 years. Break out of your comfort zone and start a new activity with your spouse. Turn off your TV and go once or twice a week to dance salsa. Take up roller blading. If you are too over weight to start physical activities, postpone it 3 months and buy yourself a Valentine’s Day present. Your best choice is the program “Change Your Body and Be Admired” by your neighbors, friends, colleagues and family members. Yesterday I worked out with my spouse and it was a great fun. I believe fitness is a great interpersonal connector. Let your sweat bond your souls. Speak Up About Your Needs Experts say that most divorces are a result of communication problems. Sure enough you don’t need to be an expert to reach this conclusion. But what are the communication problems they are talking about? The explicit expression of your Needs, Wants and deep Desires. Needs are the basic necessities such as the physical need to be touched and to have sex, emotional needs like being loved and cared for, and social needs such as having friends. Wants is one level deeper to the quality and quantity of sexual relationships we have, the love and appreciative gestures we get and social status. Desires are the deepest dreams, aspirations, and ambitions we have sexually, emotionally and socially. You know what I mean. The realistic fantasies. Check yourself in these 3 levels. Do you express your needs, wants and desires explicitly to your spouse? Do you express only needs and wants? Only needs? Or none of them? The toughest workout I recommend for this weekend is to take it one level deeper and share with your spouse one unexpressed need, want or desire. Warm up with a game I played just a while ago. My partner and I shared with each other a big secret that we never shared with anyone else before. Try it and you will be surprised. It’s electrifying. If it’s too tough, get fit first with Anti-Aging Fitness ProgramYou will find it easier talking to your partner while you're working out.
Article Source: http://www.bodyformind.com/db
Dov Oshri is the author of the revolutionary Anti-Aging Fitness Program "Change Your Body and Be Admired". He is the chief editor of Body for Mind – a Wellness Lifestyle for Successful People. His cutting edge Anti-Aging Fitness Program can be downloaded for FREE at http:/www.bodyformind.com
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