Boomerang | Self Sabotage | Non Toxic Living | Menopause | Mediocre Life | Self Pleasure

You don't get in life what you want. You get what you are.
-Les Brown

This eZine (No. 54)

Fitness:	Lessons from a Boomerang
Weight Loss:	What's Up With Self-Sabotage?
Wellness:	Healthy Lifestyles And Non Toxic Living
Anti-Aging:	Surviving the Menopause
Power Mind:	Are You Happy To Lead A Mediocre Life Just Because Others Do?
Sexuality:	The Joys Of Self-Pleasure!

Lessons from a Boomerang

By: Ainsley Laing MSc.

Resilience: What does that word mean to you?

To me, it means learning from mistakes and using that knowledge to create positive change. Being resilient in the face of adversity requires that a person be honest enough with him or herself to see their own mistakes for what they are without blame (self or others), reflect on what could have been done differently and have the courage to try again. Resilience involves taking the “if only….” Statement and transforming it into “next time…”

Recently, I came across a statement published in the American Journal of Clinical nutrition that said 90% of successful dieters had failed before with many of the dieters reporting several gains and losses before achieving their goals. By itself, the statement is pretty uninformative, but it does say one thing: the successful dieters didn’t give up. In fact, I would venture to speculate that most of these people kept trying different things, learning with each failure what worked and what didn’t until they found what worked for them.

It has been my observation that the same thing is true for exercise and fitness. What’s the difference between a really fit person and one that isn’t? The fit person doesn’t let failures like choosing a fitness program that they don’t like or otherwise doesn’t work for them stop them. They take the knowledge gained from their mistakes and use it to move forward.

Isn’t this how champions are made?

Can a couch potato become a champion athlete? Of course! It takes more than just the intention to do it, though. It takes commitment and a mindset change. It takes being honest with yourself about your motives. It means releasing your fear of change, fear of failure, fear of success and dependence on other people’s opinions of your choices. It involves looking at past attempts and reflecting on both the good and the bad about those attempts without judging yourself negatively.

Let’s use an example of a fictional person named Roger. Roger is a successful scientist and has a lovely family. He’s happily married, has three children and all the “trappings” related to his success. Life’s good. He has one thing in his life that bothers him: his health. When he turned 38, he started to show medical signs of years of inactivity and overweight – high cholesterol. At age 40, he knows he needs to do something to improve his health, but the motivation isn’t stronger than the “pain” of changing his lifestyle….yet.

Over the years, Roger has sporadically gone to the gym and not eaten too much “junk” food but he has never been particularly motivated. He chose to be too busy to make his own health a priority. Whenever he starts a new fitness program and gets frustrated he feels like a failure. Failure is very a very uncomfortable feeling for Roger. He doesn’t like it, so he runs from it.

Wham! One day he has a mild heart attack and ends up in the hospital. The pain of change just became less important than his motivation to be healthy! Roger must change his life or lose it. BIG motivator. Sadly, this type of earth shaking experience is all too often the impetus for change.

Roger no longer has trouble with mindset changes when faced with the alternative which is possibly premature death. But what about our second fictional person, Elizabeth?

Elizabeth is 35, has a successful career, great family and no health problems. She has always felt healthy and is mildly active. She intends to work out 4 hours per week but usually only manages on average two hours per week. She is always “dieting”, going from one fad diet to the other. She feels like she has 3 kilos (6.6 pounds) too much weight. Not enough to impact her health.

So, what really are her honest motives to change? Does she have any? When she is honest with herself she knows she is motivated by the way her body looks. This makes her uncomfortable because she feels that other people would think she is vain or superficial (I am sure that her husband doesn’t mind one bit that she wants to look good!). This uncomfortable feeling is keeping her from changing her mind set and developing strategies for success. All because of other people’s opinions about what should or should not be important to her.

See why it’s important for Elizabeth to reflect on her fears and impediments to fitness success? It’s also important for her to come to terms with the idea that what she has been doing hasn’t accomplished what she wants it to. Then, she will need to identify and embrace changes that she decides will work for her. This self reflection will lead her down her own personal championship road.

Real lasting change comes from resiliency… growing from our mistakes. Champions are made one mistake at a time! Like a boomerang, they always come back for more.

About the Author:
Ainsley Laing, MSc. has been a Fitness Trainer for 25 years and writes exclusively Body for Mind eZine. She holds certifications in Group Exercise, Sports Nutrition and Personal Fitness Training. Click here to read other articles by Ainsley.

What's Up With Self-Sabotage?

By: Jullie Harvard

Does this sound familiar?

How many times have we started a new diet with the very best of intentions? We know we picked a good program, we're excited, we've stocked up on the essentials. We might even manage to do well for a few days.

Then the shoe falls. Our resolve wanders. We almost look for an excuse to cheat. You ask yourself, “Why?”

You know full well that 14 strong days as free of temptation as possible will garner you the best chance of weight loss success.

Good plan! So, what do you instead? You make a date to meet your pals at the local hangout – you know, the one with the free Happy Hour buffet and 25¢ beers. You rationalize you “deserve” it. You convince yourself that your friends will bolster you with “support”. Lastly, you promise yourself to stick to 1, okay 2 max, Michelob Lights.

Yeah that was the promise, but it didn't quite turn out that way. Yet again.

It's not like we need to someone to hold our hand into temptation! It surely doesn't help that there's a McDonalds, Burger King and/or Pizza Hut on every corner. Calling at us like an epic siren, we turn into the drive thru like Pavlov's dogs. Our low carb brain tells us to order a bunless cheeseburger or grilled chicken salad, meanwhile we splurt out “Big Mac & Diet Coke”. Of course Diet Coke! Hey, we're on a diet!

Why do we do it? Why do we set ourselves up? Seemingly, almost on purpose?

Personally, I think it's akin to the emotional reasons we eat, whether we're actually hungry or not. The next time you're standing in front of the fridge, door swung wide open, staring in a blank trance as if some magical 0 cal 0 carb delicious delight will suddenly appear. Take comfort in knowing that your dieting sisters and brothers are joining you world over.

Self examination is the key. What's going on inside your brain? What are we furiously trying to bury under the wrong foods and poor choices? What on earth are we afraid of? Worried that we can't blame personal failures on our fat anymore? Scared about sudden attention and flirting from the opposite sex?

Zillions of books have been written on the subject and I'm far from an expert, but I have spent the better portion of my adult life pondering this puzzle. Therapy is probably the most obvious answer, but we don't have time and I'm certainly unqualified! Behavior modification techniques would be beneficial, as are online support groups, like those at the Kimkins.com site.

For my buck, the most bang is journaling. Yes, men, even you. You've heard confession is good for the soul. Well, it's absolutely true. As luck would have it, your Kimkins membership comes with your very own personal journal – yours to share with other members for accountability or just to jot down your inner most feelings.

We'll touch more on self-sabotage in upcoming article. But for now, committing feelings and insecurities, whether to paper or bandwidth, can help.

Go ahead, discover yourself.

About the Author:
This article is written by Kimkins Diet founder, Kimmer, who struggled with morbid obesity for 25 years before developing her quick weight loss diet, Kimkins. Members of the http://www.kimkins.com site experience amazing weight loss often averaging 1 pound per day -- without exercise!

Healthy Lifestyles And Non Toxic Living

By: Claire Quaty

All over the world people are turning their attention to the new and healthier lifestyles that seem to be vogue over the past few years in hopes of garnering a longer and more fulfilling life. Smoking, drinking and fatty foods top the list of woes that the doctors wish to see dispelled but there is a new and more common threat to the health and welfare of the human race. This threat is what many consider to be the worst of worst, claiming the lives of thousands each year who could have lived ten or more years.

The newest aspect of healthy living is doing away with all the toxins that reside within our bodies. The basis of this lifestyle change is to do away with the foods and drinks that contain toxins to rid our bodies of the so called impurities that are causing the horrible diseases of the day. According to the newest research, there are possibly deadly toxins floating around in everything from red meat to the water that we drink on a daily basis. This research purports that we should move to the high ground with such items and take on the more healthy approach to eating and drinking. This can mean some drastic and sudden lifestyle changes which may bring about a dramatic shock to the system, something that many believe to be a good thing.

The water that we are drinking is the main source of toxins according to the supporters of this theory. Outside of what is normally added by the government in terms of fluoride, the research points to some deadly toxins present that are the result of our constant abuse of the Earth that have leaked in after centuries. These toxins are present in the everyday tap water that we use for cooking and drinking and are responsible for many of the worst diseases that are currently known.

While this theory is not a widely supported one, there are those in the traditional medical community that are stating their support. There are chemicals and toxins in everyday drinking water that are known to be causes of such diseases as cancer. However, the main point that many are trying to make is the fact that the toxins are in such low doses that we can effectively fight off the effects with just the normal systems of our body.

Most of those that subscribe to this theory are moving towards the non-toxic lifestyle that includes bottled water that is boiled prior to drinking and eating only the most fresh and organic fruits and vegetables. The organic foods that they speak of are grown under strict conditions to ensure that there are no toxins present during the growing process. The other factors are of course avoiding tobacco use and no alcoholic beverages to speak of.

About the Author:
Read more from this author at: http://science-mag.com

Visit Mark Joyner for more of his
personal development brain puzzle cartoons.

Surviving the Menopause

By: Noel Swanson

Sometime during her life, a woman will go through menopause. Normally it will happen when she is between 50 and 54, but it can occur when she's younger or older. Menopause means that a woman's ovaries are shutting down and will stop producing estrogen and progesterone. Menstruation will diminish, and will stop altogether when the ovaries quit functioning.

Menopause is the part of a woman's normal aging process and it will happen to all who haven't had their uterus and ovaries surgically removed. If this is the case, premature menopause will occur. In some cases, only the uterus is taken out and the ovaries are left. Under these circumstances, there are no immediate menopausal symptoms, since the patient is still receiving the hormones mentioned above.

At the onset women don't generally experience symptoms. Over time, as the ovaries produce less of the hormones, the monthly cycle will be affected. One month she may experience heavy menstruation and the next month she may only have a couple of days of spotting.

There are a number of symptoms that start manifesting as she begins to enter the various phases of menopause: (1) hot flashes (2) irritability (3) sweating at odd times (4) sleep disturbances (5) vaginal dryness that can lead to sexual and urinary discomfort (6) mood swings that may include anger and depression. (7) hair growth on the face, arms, chest and stomach (8) memory problems and difficulty with concentration (9) low frustration level, affecting her whole mood.

The best advice for a middle-aged woman is to look for information on menopause. The more she knows about it, the more she will know what to expect and how to cope with it. She will also feel less alone in the world when the symptoms appear.

Eating well-balanced meals and keeping up with her exercise can be among the most positive approaches she can take. Taking charge of her own body, including good nutrition, will help her experience minimal symptoms. She should also consider vitamins and minerals in the form of supplements. Any woman, who has a great deal of difficulty during menopause, may want to consider hormone replacement therapy. It's always vital to stay in touch with her doctor throughout menopause. That way any other changes not related to menopause won't be missed. Some women may want to seek out a support group. It's always helpful to have contact with people experiencing the same life conditions as you.

About the Author:
For more articles on Menopause why not visit: http://www.amemenopause.com/articles

Are You Happy To Lead A Mediocre Life Just Because Others Do?

By: Pat Campbell

When we read historical novels, we may laugh at the pointless lives that the gentry of that period led. The well to do who lived centuries ago spent their lives in idle pursuits totally oblivious (in most cases) to the wretchedness of the poor who spent all their waking hours working in return for meagre sustenance. And they were so overly concerned with living their lives according to regimented protocol; it just wasn’t "the done thing" to do things differently than the way the neighbours did things. The lives of the poor were just as pointless because they failed to realise that they could improve themselves if only they tried. The few who did succeed in breaking free of poverty were generally ostracised by their families because they dared to do things differently.

But are we any different today? Have we really learnt anything at all? The activities of the 21st century are vastly different from those of previous times but many are just as pointless. And today, in this current advanced era, people on the whole are still far too concerned with what their family, friends and neighbours think. Very few people are willing to change.

Is your life perfect? If it is then there is no need to change anything. But I have never yet met anyone with a perfect life, have you? Some people have a career they love but their family life suffers. Some people have very good relationships with their families and friends but their health and fitness are not very good. And some people have a totally stuffed up life in nearly all areas. Even if we have some things right, there are always areas in which we can improve ourselves, we shouldn't just get to a certain age and stop. Life is all about learning; it isn’t something reserved for the young.

People will say, "Oh I couldn’t do it that way because everyone I know does it this way!" But are all those people you know getting perfect results! Very unlikely! So why keep doing things a certain way, with mediocre results, just because everyone else does it that way? Isn't it time to make a change and do things your own way? Maybe, just maybe, you will see vast improvements in your life. And if you stuff up or don't get it quite right the first time, don't give up. Just keep on trying things out until you find what really works for you. Don’t be bothered by those who try to deter you. Your true friends will support you and the opinion of the rest of them doesn't matter!

One thing to remember - if others object to what you are doing or becoming, it is because it is a reflection of something in their own lives that they need to deal with. When they see you becoming successful in some area of your life, they feel unsettled because they know that they should be trying to make improvements in their lives too and you are reminding them of that deficiency in themselves! So it is never about you, it is about them. The sad fact is that most people are quite prepared to plod along living a mediocre existence. They really cannot see that there are better possibilities for them if only they make an effort. But you can see the possibilities, so go and live your dreams!

About the Author:
My aim is to help as many people as possible realise their full potential from both a human and spiritual perspective. My website provides resources for personal and spiritual development including articles, newsletter and help available by email.
Pat Campbell
"TheArcher"
http://www.eyeofthearcher.com.au

The Joys Of Self-Pleasure!

By: Marie Claire

Manually pleasuring yourself should be as natural as sex itself. And, while many people are embarrassed by it, you really shouldn't be. O.k., maybe you don't want to broadcast it to your neighbors, friends, and family, but between you and your lover it doesn't have to be a secret.

Masturbation actually does serve a purpose. Besides your own enjoyment, it also teaches you what feels good, and where it feels good. It teaches you how to relax during a sexual encounter in order to have better or more orgasms. These lessons you learn can then be verbalized to your lover during sex for an even better sexual experience. Simply put, you've learned where it feels good when you do it, now tell him so he can make you feel good.

Remember that pleasuring yourself is not about how many times you come to an orgasm. Or even whether you orgasm at all. It's about pleasing yourself, making you feel good like no one else can. While orgasms are great. they real just indicate the highest point of pleasure during sexual arousal. There are many, many points in between that are immensely pleasurable. There is nothing wrong with you if you do not have an orgasm. Concentrate on how good you can make yourself feel.

Generally over time, you will learn what and where feels best and how to bring yourself to orgasm. But don't let that be the focus of masturbation, just enjoy the feelings.

Try arranging some alone time. Go somewhere you won't be bothered. Make sure you have some time available to you so you can relax and enjoy yourself. If you can, lock the door so you won't be disturbed, if not make sure you request that this time be your alone time. Having a family can make alone time difficult, try requesting bath time once per week. This will be your alone time to relax and get away from the every day stresses.

If you're new to pleasuring yourself, or just looking to get more out of it try creating some ambience. Bring a cassette or cd player with you to listen to soft music. Purchase a few scented candles. The fragrance lavender is known for it's relaxation properties. Then relax and enjoy your time alone with yourself. Enjoy the soft music, and the scent and glow of the candles. Don't rush, start off slow and easy. You know where to touch to make you feel good, don't be embarrassed, just go with it.

Enjoy!
Marie Clare

About the Author:
Marie Clare is a Relationship Consultant and Author. Check out her lastest reviews on the Best Online Dating Sites. Plus FREE Articles, Tips and Advice on Dating, Relationship, Romance and Sexuality. http://www.lifematesnow.com

Volume 1: Change Your Body & Be Admired

How to Get the Sexy, Sleek, Attractive Look You’ve Always Dreamed Of

Part 1 –Turn Back the Clock

Part 2 – Unleash the Power of Your Mind
Part 3 – Nourish Your Body to Get Young
Part 4 – Spice Up Life with Supplements
Part 5 – Get Fit and Beat Your Body's Aging
Part 6 - Put it All Together

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For your health,

Ainsley & Dov

Your Age Fighters

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